


Leftovers

by Polomonkey



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Dirty Talk, Dubious Consent, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Romance, Sexual Content, Voyeurism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-11
Updated: 2015-05-11
Packaged: 2018-03-30 00:00:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,060
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3915586
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Polomonkey/pseuds/Polomonkey
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Merlin's boyfriend Cenred likes to bring men home from clubs and watch them have sex with Merlin. Merlin doesn't particularly enjoy it but he does it to please his boyfriend. Then one night Cenred brings home Arthur, and everything changes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Leftovers

**Author's Note:**

> Another kink meme fill I did recently, original prompt can be found [here](http://kinkme-merlin.livejournal.com/36351.html?thread=40297983#t40297983)
> 
> There's no real Merlin/Cenred contact in this fic beyond an established relationship, but there is very brief Arthur/Cenred at the beginning. Emotional abuse and dub con tags don't refer to Merlin/Arthur.

It wasn’t exactly a hardship to go home with the good looking dark haired man who danced so suggestively next to Arthur before pulling him in for a lingering kiss. He wasn’t Arthur’s usual type, slightly too toned and well groomed, but it had been a while and Arthur really needed to connect with someone tonight. Even someone whose smile didn’t quite fit their face. 

The man said his name was Cenred and he hailed a cab with ease, palming Arthur’s cock through his jeans during the ride until Arthur felt needy and desperate. He followed Cenred into his flat, not even waiting for the other man to flick the light on before pushing him back against the wall and capturing his lips in a fierce kiss.

Then the room was flooded with light and Arthur wasted a second wondering how Cenred had turned it on when his hands were fisted in Arthur’s hair before he realised and spun towards the doorway.

There was a man standing there, maybe one or two years younger than Arthur. He was dressed in pyjama bottoms and a faded X-Men t-shirt and his dark hair was tousled with sleep. Arthur allowed his eyes to flicker to the man’s big blue eyes, his plump pink lips, before his brain caught up and he abruptly stepped back from Cenred’s embrace. 

“Shit! I’m really sorry, I didn’t know,” he said, because the man was obviously no roommate just from the way he was looking at Cenred, and Arthur really never meant to stumble into something like this.

“He didn’t say he had a boyfriend,” he added quickly, turning to glare at Cenred. He was surprised to find the other man was lounging against the wall, looking nothing like a person who had just been caught cheating. 

“Relax, sailor, it’s not what you think,” Cenred drawled. “Merlin knows all about my little dalliances, don’t you babe?”

Arthur’s eyes flicked back over to the other man – Merlin – and watched him nod slowly, expression inscrutable.

“So he’s not your boyfriend?” Arthur asked, confused.

“Oh he is. But we like to change things up every now and then. Three’s company and all that.”

“You want a threesome?”

Arthur tried to sound scandalised but if he was honest with himself, the thought wasn’t unappealing. Cenred was hot and this Merlin was positively delectable. He fitted Arthur’s type exactly, all pale and pretty with long coltish limbs.

“Not exactly,” Cenred said, pushing himself off the wall and walking over to Merlin to caress his cheek. “See, I’m the type that likes to watch, and Merlin’s the type that likes to take. So we’re just hoping you’re the type that likes to… give.”

Arthur’s brain may have been a little slowed by drink but he got it. Cenred wanted to watch while he fucked Merlin. It might have been straight out of the plot of a slightly sleazy porn film but Arthur couldn’t deny the jolt of arousal it sent straight to his cock. 

He opened his mouth to say yes and then realised that Merlin was still yet to say a word.

“Are you up for this?” he said directly to Merlin, ignoring the slight frown that crossed Cenred’s face. He wasn’t about to do anything without being sure that everyone was in full agreement.

Merlin looked startled to be addressed, like he hadn’t expected it. 

“I… yes. Yes, of course.”

His voice was soft but clear. And yet Arthur still wanted to make sure. He walked over and right up into Merlin’s space, giving him the chance to back away if he wanted. Merlin didn’t move. 

Arthur leaned in and kissed him, gently at first. For a moment there was no reaction and then he felt soft lips moving against his. He deepened the kiss, wrapping his hands around Merlin’s waist and felt the younger man lean into him, pressing up against his body. He didn’t move his hands anywhere else, waiting for Merlin to give him a signal, and when he felt Merlin’s erection pressing up against him he drew back in satisfaction. Merlin was slightly flushed but he looked up to meet Arthur’s gaze and then his face creased in the most beautiful smile. The first genuine one Arthur had seen all night. 

That clinched it. He was doing this.

“Bedroom,” Cenred said on cue behind them, clearly pleased by the display. Arthur let Merlin lead the way, watching his arse in the loose pyjama bottoms, eager to rip them off and get to work. 

Once in the bedroom, Cenred settled himself in a chair by the bed and unzipped his jeans, reaching inside to lazily stroke himself. Arthur hovered next to the bed, slightly awkward. Merlin was looking at Cenred, not him, almost as though he was waiting for instruction.

They probably play this game a lot, Arthur realised. They probably had it down to a t. Merlin obviously liked to take orders from Cenred, while Cenred liked being the one to direct the show. He decided to just let them get on with it, and do what he was told. It was already shaping up to be one of the hottest nights of his life, he was happy to relinquish control for a bit.

“Kiss again,” Cenred said and Arthur didn’t need telling twice, drawing Merlin towards him to pick up where they left off. Merlin felt so warm under his hands, his lips so sweet. Arthur had the sudden strange thought that he could kiss this man forever and be happy. He dismissed it an instant later. This was someone else’s boyfriend and someone else’s fantasy he was a part of right now, and he knew it would only last for one night.

Still, he couldn’t help melting into the kiss, so much so that Cenred’s voice came as a rude reminder of the real situation.

“Take his clothes off.”

Arthur was pretty sure that was directed at him. He turned back to Merlin, who was already lifting his arms to allow Arthur to slip his t-shirt off. He pulled down the pyjama bottoms, tugging Merlin forward to step out of them, and took a moment to drink in the lithe form of the man in front of him, covered only by a pair of navy briefs. Merlin looked so deliciously pale and smooth, unblemished almost. 

“Beautiful,” he couldn’t help but whisper and Merlin gave him a shy smile.

“And the rest,” Cenred intoned from behind them, clearly impatient with the delay.

Arthur reached out to touch Merlin’s hips, caressing him slightly before hooking his fingers into the briefs and sliding them down. Merlin’s cock sprang out, half hard – though clearly not as hard as Arthur’s, which was straining painfully against his jeans at this point. Arthur moved to take off his own shirt before Cenred cut in.

“No. Keep your clothes on.”

Arthur shrugged. It wasn’t the way he’d have chosen to do it but he’d already accepted he wasn’t calling the shots tonight, so he just caught Merlin’s lips in another quick kiss.

“Enough foreplay, get him on the bed.”

Arthur walked Merlin backward until he reached the bed and then gently pushed the other man down on his back. He climbed on top, seeking Merlin’s lips again but his eyes were turned towards his boyfriend.

Arthur found himself looking round at Cenred too; clearly Merlin wanted to wait until the next instruction came.

Cenred smirked.

“Lick his nipples; he’s a slut for that.”

Arthur inwardly winced at the word ‘slut’ but he reminded himself that some people liked that kind of dirty talk. It didn’t really appeal to him but if it got Merlin and Cenred off then who was he to judge?

Licking Merlin’s nipples definitely did appeal to him, however, he eagerly leaned down to suck one into his mouth before flicking at it with his tongue. Merlin shivered, and when he repeated his actions with the other one, Merlin let out a moan. It was an intoxicating sound and Arthur vowed he’d hear more like that from the other man before the night was out.

“Listen to him, moaning like a whore,” Cenred said, and Arthur could swear that Merlin flinched almost imperceptibly. But then it seemed like he’d imagined it as Merlin wrapped his legs around Arthur’s waist and pulled him in closer. Arthur was almost glad his jeans were still on; the tightness was preventing him from making a fool of himself and coming too soon. He didn’t seem to have much control where Merlin was concerned.

Unbidden, he nuzzled slightly at Merlin’s neck, and was rewarded with another soft sound of pleasure. He was kissing along Merlin’s collar bone when Cenred spoke again.

“D’you want him to blow you?” 

His words sounded far too blunt in the charged atmosphere of the room. Arthur shook his head, he was scared he wouldn’t last much longer and he’d rather get inside Merlin before he lost it.

Plus, Cenred didn’t make it sound particularly desirable. Something about the way he said it seemed a bit… sordid.

Arthur tried to ignore Cenred and focus his attention on Merlin, capturing his lips again before nibbling them slightly. Merlin tightened his legs around Arthur, which he took to be a sign that Merlin liked that. He did it again and Merlin smiled slightly into his mouth. Arthur found it almost unbearably cute. 

“Okay, time for the main show.”

For the first time, Arthur wished Cenred wasn’t there at all. Fucking some guy while his boyfriend watched had seemed insanely hot only fifteen minutes ago, but now Arthur just wanted to be with Merlin. Make love to him. Just the two of them.

It wasn’t on the table though. However responsive Merlin was being, Arthur knew it was just part of the play between him and Cenred. Merlin didn’t want to be with Arthur by himself, that wasn’t the game. 

He sighed inwardly.

“How d’you want him?” Cenred asked.

Arthur hesitated. He didn’t have much of a preference really, though he’d like to see Merlin’s face…

Cenred seemed to take his silence as deliberation.

“He’s nice and flexible, you can arrange him how you want really,” he said casually. “And he’s light enough to lift if you want to ram him down on your cock.”

This time Arthur really did wince. He knew it was all part of the fantasy but it sounded so… harsh. Not at all suited to the way he’d choose to make love to someone as sweet as Merlin.

He turned back to Merlin, whose face was oddly blank.

“How would you like it?” he said, not missing Cenred’s irritated inhale from behind. Well, tough. If this was “breaking the rules” they could just chuck him out. He didn’t have it in him to be so disrespectful to a sexual partner.

Merlin looked incredibly surprised to be asked, but he didn’t look angry.

“I… maybe… like this?”

And he brought his knees up towards his body.

Arthur smiled, glad he’d be able to see Merlin’s face. He wanted to gauge the younger man’s reactions, to see how he reacted to pleasure and hear the noises he made. He had a thought and grabbed a pillow from the back of the bed and slipped it under Merlin’s hips so that he’d be more comfortable.

Merlin smiled luminously at him, and then the moment was interrupted by Cenred unceremoniously dropping a condom and a bottle of lube on the bed next to them.

Arthur squirted some of the lube onto his fingers and spread Merlin’s legs gently, exposing the small pucker between. 

“May I?” he said softly, unconsciously lowering his voice so that Cenred couldn’t hear. 

Merlin nodded, his cheeks pink. 

Arthur carefully pushed one finger inside of Merlin, moving it around a little when he got inside.

“He can take more than that, you don’t need to coddle him,” came an unwelcome voice from behind him. Arthur decided to ignore it this time.

After an amount of time he deemed suitable, disregarding Cenred’s huffing in the background, he slipped another finger in. He readjusted his angle, trying to push up against that special spot and was gratified when Merlin suddenly bucked his hips.

“Oh!” he said, sounding almost surprised.

“There we are,” Arthur murmured, crooking his finger in the same way again. Merlin’s cock was at full hardness now and Arthur took a moment to congratulate himself. He didn’t know why but giving Merlin even the slightest amount of pleasure seemed like an immeasurable victory to him.

“So you found his g-spot, clever you,” Cenred’s bored voice rang out. “He can squirm on your fingers like that for hours, believe me, but I was hoping I might see something a little more spectacular tonight.”

Arthur gritted his teeth. It was getting harder to pay Cenred no mind. But he brought his focus back to Merlin, adding a third finger just to make sure he was nice and stretched. Merlin was prettily flushed by now, his hips jerking every now and then as Arthur opened him up. Arthur withdrew his fingers slowly and unzipped his jeans. He remembered that Cenred had wanted him to keep his clothes on, and while he didn’t care much what Cenred thought anymore, he decided to just pull his jeans and boxers down a little, just enough to pull his aching cock out.

His hand shook slightly as he rolled the condom on, he didn’t want to accidentally stimulate himself and he was on a knife edge as it was, with Merlin spread out so beautifully beneath him. He willed himself to last as he lined up at Merlin’s entrance, before looking up to meet the younger man’s eyes.

“You ready?” he whispered and Merlin nodded eagerly, his cock still firm.

Arthur pushed in slowly, savouring the tightness around him, the heat. He stopped when fully seated to check that Merlin wasn’t showing any signs of discomfort.

“Get on with it,” Cenred said. 

Arthur rolled his eyes, he couldn't help himself, and Merlin actually giggled. Arthur leaned in to kiss him again, entranced by even that simple sound. He was so gone on this guy it was unbelievable.

He slowly drew out to thrust back in and Merlin sighed as his body moved with Arthur’s.

“Harder,” Cenred said, and Arthur pretended not to hear. He kept up a steady rhythm, his own urgency to come sublimated slightly in trying to make sure that Merlin was having a good time too.

“He’s not made of china, give him a proper fuck! Show him who’s boss, make him beg for it!”

Merlin almost certainly flinched that time and Arthur frowned. The malice in Cenred’s tone sounded all too real at this point. Arthur didn’t know if Merlin was enjoying the game much anymore; it seemed like Cenred was taking things too far.

He leant down to whisper in Merlin’s ear, secure in the knowledge he couldn’t be overheard.

“Do you want me to stop?”

Merlin’s answer was immediate; even a second’s pause and Arthur would have pulled out.

“No, please don’t stop.”

“Are you enjoying this?” Arthur pressed, wanting to be sure.

“Yes,” Merlin breathed, dropping a kiss to the side of Arthur’s face.

“You’re incredible,” Arthur said, unable to stop himself, and Merlin smiled wide.

Arthur quickened his pace slightly and Merlin groaned in arousal, rocking his hips to meet Arthur’s thrusts. Cenred was saying something in the background but he was too lost in the moment to hear it, and he was pretty sure the same was true for Merlin. They kept eye contact as they moved together, and when Arthur felt the pressure building inside him, he reached out to fist Merlin’s cock, determined to let him orgasm first.

It didn’t take long, only five or six strokes and Merlin was coming, gasping out his pleasure as though it shocked him. It was all Arthur needed, he came not twenty seconds later, calling Merlin’s name.

They both panted for a moment, catching their breath, coming down from the high. Arthur pulled out very carefully, then quickly tied off the condom and chucked it on the floor. He crawled back up the bed to give Merlin a long kiss, smoothing his hair away from his forehead. He’d never felt such an overwhelming contentment after sex, all he wanted to do was lie down next to Merlin and stroke his hair and hold him while they both slept…

There was a noise and Arthur turned to see Cenred standing over them, cock in hand, and before he could react Cenred had shot his load all over Merlin’s face. 

Arthur was on his feet before he even knew what he was doing, pushing Cenred away from the bed. It wasn’t that Cenred had come on Merlin’s face, or even that he hadn’t given him any warning; it was the way that Merlin cringed away from it. Miserable but not surprised.

He didn’t like it. Arthur could see it in his eyes. He didn’t like any of this.

“The fuck d’you think you’re doing?” Cenred said dangerously, squaring up to him.

“He didn’t want you to do that,” Arthur said in a low voice. 

“Excuse me? And who are you to tell me what my boyfriend wants?” Cenred spat.

“Do you even know what he wants? Did he want any of this tonight?” Arthur said, rage coursing through him. “Or does he not get a choice?”

“Of course he has a fucking choice; he likes it just as much as I do. More, probably, he’s an eager little sl-”

“Don’t. Call him that.” 

Cenred sneered.

“Or what? I think it’s time you left, mate. You’ve outstayed your welcome.”

Arthur exhaled, hard.

“Is this your flat?”

“What?”

“Is this your flat?”

“No. It’s mine.”

Merlin spoke for the first time from behind him.

Arthur whirled back around, remembering the person he should be focussed on.

“Merlin, do you want me to leave?”

A pause.

“No,” Merlin said distinctly.

“Do you want him to leave?”

Merlin didn’t answer, starting to worry his lip. He’d pulled himself into a sitting position on the bed, knees hugged to his chest.

“Of course he doesn’t want me to leave. Do you, babe? Babe?”

For the first time that night, there was a note of uncertainty in Cenred’s voice.

“I…” Merlin trailed off. He bit down on his lip again.

“You should go,” Arthur said, turning back to Cenred.

“Don’t be stupid, I’m his boyfriend. I’m his… Merlin?”

“You… you should go,” Merlin muttered, barely audible.

“You’re not talking to me?” Cenred said.

“Yes,” Merlin said, slightly louder. “I am.”

“But I’m… I’m your boyfriend,” Cenred said, and he suddenly sounded very small.

“Maybe… maybe not anymore.” Merlin said, and looked surprised at himself. 

Cenred’s face darkened and Arthur tensed, ready to defend Merlin if he tried anything. But Cenred only grabbed his phone off the side and shrugged on his jacket.

“Fine. You were a lousy fuck anyway, that’s why I kept bringing people home to do the job for me,” he hissed.

“Get out,” Arthur said, teeth clenched.

“I’m going, I’m going. You’re welcome to him, mate. Enjoy my leftovers.” 

And then Cenred was gone.

As soon as they heard the flat door slam, Merlin began to cry. Little quiet sobs, almost noiseless, like he didn’t want to make a fuss.

He still had Cenred’s come on his face and it made Arthur’s gut wrench to see it. He grabbed a tissue off the side table and climbed onto the bed, gently leaning in to wipe Merlin’s face.

“Hey now, hey now,” he said softly. “I’m here, you’re alright.”

He leaned down to grab Merlin’s discarded pyjama bottoms off the floor and handed them over.

When Merlin had pulled them on Arthur reached out to touch his shoulder, and Merlin launched himself at Arthur, clinging to his shirt as he wept. Arthur put his arms around him, manoeuvring them so he was leaning against the headboard, Merlin curled up in his lap. He held him close until Merlin’s sobs turned into snuffles, pressing gentle kisses on his forehead.

They sat there in silence for a few minutes before Merlin spoke.

“I’m sorry… I didn’t actually… what was your name?”

“Arthur,” he answered automatically and then froze. Merlin didn’t even know his name?

Of course he didn’t, there’d been no introductions. He’d simply walked into Merlin’s flat and taken him to bed, all on the instructions of Merlin’s piece of shit boyfriend.

A hot wave of shame washed over him.

What was he doing, touching Merlin like this? Hadn’t he just figured out that Merlin hadn’t been a fully consenting partner in any of this? Why was he forcing his presence on someone he’d effectively just assaulted?

He tried to detach himself but Merlin clung on, gripping him tight.

“Merlin, I should… I should go too.”

“What? Why?”

“Because I… you…” Suddenly all the words were welling up inside him and Arthur wanted to weep too. “I didn’t know you didn’t want it… the sex… I never would have done it if I’d known. I thought… I thought it was a game, that you and Cenred liked it like that, but you never wanted to do it at all, did you?”

Arthur felt sick with guilt.

“I’m so so sorry. I should have known. I know an apology doesn’t make up for… for assaulting you-”

“Arthur, stop! You didn’t assault me!”

“I did! He’s been making you have sex with other men, hasn’t he? And I didn’t even bother to find out if you-”

“Listen to me. Arthur, please, just listen. I wanted to have sex with you. I fully consented to having sex with you. I enjoyed having sex with you.”

Arthur couldn’t believe it. 

“You couldn’t say no to Cenred…”

“I could say no to you,” Merlin said firmly. “You gave me so many chances. You checked if I was up for it right at the start, you kept asking if I was comfortable, you even offered to stop right in the middle. I said yes all those times because I liked it. I liked you. I… like you.”

The pain in Arthur’s chest eased a little. He couldn’t honestly say he thought Merlin could fully consent to anything with the malign influence of Cenred in the background, but he was relieved to hear Merlin didn’t feel forced or coerced by his own presence. 

“I like you too,” he said. “That’s why I’m sorry about everything that happened tonight.”

Merlin looked worried.

“Arthur… I know you think Cenred’s some evil boyfriend but it really wasn’t like that. Relationships are about compromise, right? Seeing me with other men got Cenred off, and even if it didn’t really do it for me, I didn’t mind.”

“And did Cenred compromise for you?” Arthur asked quietly.

“I… yeah, he did. I mean, he hates anything romantic or lovey dovey but he knew I liked it so he used to take me out for dinner or hold my hand in the street.”

Arthur wanted to cry for how pathetically low the bar had been set, that Merlin thought dinner and hand-holding were some kind of bounteous privileges generously bestowed on him by Cenred. Equal to being expected to give up his body to other men.

He turned to face Merlin, trying to think of the right words to say. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt him, and it was thin ice he was treading on.

“So did you… did you like the men he brought home?”

“Yeah. Mostly. They were… they were fine.”

“Were they rough?”

“Sometimes, but that’s how Cenred likes it. No-one ever hurt me or anything. Cenred was totally in control, he’d have made them stop if something went wrong.”

 _I wouldn’t be so sure,_ Arthur thought bitterly, but he kept it to himself.

“And could you say no?”

“What? Yeah, of course I could. I told you Arthur, it was all about compromise. We negotiated about stuff. Like, for example, I said right at the start that condoms were non-optional and I got Cenred to agree to that.”

Got Cenred to agree? Merlin actually had to persuade him? Arthur felt his blood boiling but he made sure his voice stayed calm.

“So did you ever say no?”

“I… yeah, once. Cenred brought home this really creepy guy and the whole thing was weirding me out so I refused and the guy left in a huff.”

“And how did Cenred take that?”

“He… well, he was mad because I guess he felt I was going against what we negotiated. He stopped coming round for a week or two. So I called him and… apologised.” 

Merlin finished the sentence with a note of uncertainty, like he was just hearing for the first time how it sounded.

“Do you maybe see how Cenred was pressuring you to do what he wanted?” Arthur said very gently. “By telling you it was all part of the healthy compromise of relationships, and then punishing you when you asserted yourself?”

Merlin’s face twisted in dismay.

“No. You’re making it sound all… he wasn’t… You’re making it sound like he was abusive or something.”

“I think there were aspects of Cenred’s behaviour that were abusive,” Arthur said carefully. He felt like screaming to the heavens that Cenred was an out and out bastard but it wasn’t what Merlin needed to hear right now.

Merlin looked upset.

“But we negotiated everything…”

“I think there’s good and bad types of negotiation, especially when it comes to sex,” Arthur said slowly. “It can be fun to try out different things and see if you both like them. I don’t think it’s ever right to expect one partner to regularly do something they don’t enjoy, just because the other partner does.”

“He used to give me the kind of sex I enjoyed too, though,” Merlin said desperately. “He hated going slow and being gentle but he did it for me, just as long as I…”

He trailed off again.

“Just as long as you agreed to keep sleeping with other men?” Arthur guessed. “That’s not a compromise, Merlin, that’s… coercion.”

Merlin’s face crumpled and Arthur felt he’d gone too far. It was too much to deal with everything in one night, he couldn’t expect Merlin to just snap out the mind-set Cenred had clearly been cultivating for God knows how long. 

“Okay, okay, I’m sorry, we won’t talk about it anymore. I think you should probably get some sleep now.”

He made to rise off the bed but Merlin grabbed his arm.

“Wait, will you… will you stay the night?”

Part of Arthur wondered if it was best he left, so Merlin could have some time alone to think, and part of him wanted to crawl under the covers with him and hold him tight.

Then he remembered that Cenred had his own set of keys to the flat and if there was even the slightest chance he could come back tonight…

“Yes,” he said and Merlin dimpled at him. “Oh but… I’m kind of, uh, sticky.”

He gestured to his hastily pulled up jeans, the fly not even done up.

“There’s wet wipes in the bathroom, and a spare toothbrush in the cupboard. And I can lend you some boxers…”

“Great,” Arthur said and slipped into the bathroom, making short work of shedding his clothes and cleaning himself off. He brushed his teeth and then ruffled up his hair slightly in the mirror, feeling a bit silly for the way he still wanted to impress Merlin after everything that had happened.

He couldn’t help it. He was smitten. Even if he refused to ever act on his feelings without Merlin’s say so.

He walked back into the room naked and it was only Merlin’s slight intake of breath that made him remember the other man hadn’t actually seen him with his clothes off yet.

“Oh! Er, I’ll just…” 

Merlin walked over to the dresser and pulled out some boxer shorts, blushing slightly as he handed them over.

He grabbed a clean pair of pyjama bottoms from the drawer and left the room and Arthur wandered over to the bed. He wasn’t presuming anything, if Merlin wanted him to sleep on the couch then that was fine. But when Merlin came back in the room, smelling of mouthwash and aloe vera soap, he gestured to the bed.

“Come on, then.”

His tone was slightly teasing and Arthur caught a glimpse of the man Merlin was when he wasn’t being pressured or intimidated, someone impish and irreverent; the same man who’d giggled when Arthur rolled his eyes in bed.

Arthur snapped the light off and climbed in carefully, keeping a safe distance between them, but Merlin simply rolled over and cuddled straight up to Arthur like it was completely natural.

“Is this okay?” he whispered, and Arthur responded by wrapping his arms around Merlin, pulling him in closer. Something had started here tonight, in the strangest of circumstances, and Arthur hoped it could turn into something more.

But Merlin needed time and space before that could happen so Arthur resisted the urge to kiss him and settled for stroking down his back as they lay entangled.

Merlin’s eyes were closed for so long that Arthur assumed he was asleep so he was startled when a voice spoke in the darkness. 

“I’ve never… it’s never felt like that before. Sex, I mean.”

Arthur stayed quiet, waiting for Merlin to elaborate.

“I thought I liked it with Cenred, or maybe even with some of the… others… but I always felt tense. Or anxious they weren’t enjoying it, or embarrassed, or something.”

Arthur almost clenched his fists in anger at all the men who came before but he forced himself to calm down and focus on rubbing Merlin’s back. 

“Cenred was my first.”

Arthur had suspected but it still made his stomach drop. Merlin had deserved so much better.

“And I thought... I mean, it felt okay. But tonight, with you… I feel like I finally get what all the fuss was about.”

Arthur’s heart melted. It was all he could do not to press Merlin into the mattress right there and then and try to make it even better for him this time.

It wasn’t the time for that but he hoped it would be, someday. 

“It was the best sex I ever had,” he said honestly. “I think you’re amazing, Merlin.”

He could only dimly make out Merlin’s face but he could see the enormous smile spread across it. 

He matched it with one of his own.

 

________________________________________________________________________________

 

“Indian or Chinese?”

Merlin deliberated, little pink tongue poking out of his mouth in concentration. Arthur loved it when he did that (and he suspected his boyfriend took full advantage of that fact). 

“Can we have Japanese? That place on North Street does takeaway.”

“Okay but I reserve the right to eat mine with a fork. My fingers are not made for chopsticks.”

“I know. You demolished your tuna roll last time, it was like a massacre. Wasabi splattered everywhere, bits of rice breathing their last in pool of soy sauce…”

“It was sushi, Merlin, not Saving Private Ryan.” 

“And yet you say I’m the clumsy one,” Merlin teased.

“Yes, and I will continue to say it until you manage to go a whole day without falling over.”

Merlin got up to find the takeaway menu, doing an exaggerated stumble as he passed into the kitchen.

“Don’t worry about me, just lying here with my neck broken,” he called.

“It’s probably just a flesh wound,” Arthur shouted back, settling himself on the sofa. He let out a sigh of contentment.

It had been a year since the night they first met and they’d been dating for seven months of it. Arthur insisted Merlin get a little headspace after he’d broken up with Cenred, promising he’d always be there as a friend and it was up to Merlin to decide if he wanted any more than that. 

Arthur was around a lot in those first few months, helping Merlin get the locks changed, fielding angry calls from Cenred, cooking meals on the days Merlin was too worn out by all the emotional drama to do anything. He suggested Merlin start seeing a counsellor the very day after they met, and then didn’t mention it again, wanting it to be Merlin’s choice. A month later Merlin started seeing a nice lady called Linda who helped him talk through his feelings around Cenred and their relationship. One of the hardest days was when Merlin showed up at Arthur’s flat, shaking and crying.

“He abused me,” he sobbed out, face pressed into Arthur’s shoulder. “And I didn’t even realise until now.”

Arthur could only hold him, promising that things would be better from now on. And happily, he was right. That night was a turning point, Merlin seemed to have let go some of the pain he had been carrying, to have relieved himself of the burden of making excuses for Cenred. Linda guided him through the process, and though he continued to have bad days, sitting wan and pale on the couch and refusing to eat more than a few bites of the meals Arthur cooked, he was slowly improving. Arthur made sure he kept busy, taking him out to the cinema or the park or the pub. 

He also introduced him to all of Arthur’s friends, who took to him straight away. As Merlin relaxed into their company, his sense of humour came out; delightfully whimsical one minute, dry and dark the next. Arthur loved it; loved seeing this distinct personality emerge that had been suppressed for so long, loved seeing Merlin at ease with himself.

Some weekends Arthur drove Merlin home to see his mother. Hunith had been rightfully worried about his relationship with Cenred and privately thanked Arthur for getting him out. Arthur truthfully told her that Merlin had gotten himself out and she should be very proud of him. Which she was.

And then, five months in, Merlin had shown up on Arthur’s doorstep again. But this time he wasn’t crying, and he didn’t wait to get inside the flat before drawing Arthur into a knee-weakening kiss right there in the hallway.

“I want you,” he had said. “I want to be with you.”

And Arthur had wanted the same.

It hadn’t been all plain sailing since then. Arthur still had to be careful how he phrased requests as Merlin had gotten so used to bowing to unspoken pressure. It took Merlin a while to learn that it was okay to disagree and there would be no consequences. Cenred had been his first real relationship, and there were a lot of things to be unlearned. Arthur was also very nervous the first few times they made love, worried he might subconsciously be reminding Merlin of all the bad times before. He still occasionally felt guilty about that first night they’d met, berating himself for not realising what was going on sooner.

But they worked out the kinks between them, and most of the time it was very very good. So good in fact that Arthur could scarcely believe it. He’d never thought about settling down before, he was too young for it, but the idea of being with anyone else now but Merlin seemed unthinkable. 

Merlin came back into the living room with the menu, tripping for real this time over Arthur’s discarded shoes.

“That one’s your fault,” he protested when Arthur laughed. 

“Okay, my bad,” he said, pulling his boyfriend down onto the sofa with him.

“Ooh, can we get spring rolls?” Merlin said, snuggling into Arthur’s side.

“Yes, and those little dumplings you like,” Arthur said, putting his arm around Merlin’s shoulders. “Oh hey, that’s a good nickname for you - little dumpling.”

“That’s terrible!” Merlin objected.

“Don’t get het up, dumpling,” Arthur said sweetly.

“Right, I’m gonna find one for you… you… you beancurd.”

“Awful.”

“Shrimp salad?”

“Nope.”

“Tiger prawn?”

“Pathetic.”

“What about-”

“What about this?” Arthur said swiftly and kissed him. 

“Yeah, that’s… that’s good too,” Merlin said, and leaned back in for more, menu sliding onto the ground.

Dinner would have to wait.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!


End file.
